92:  We Honour My Uncle

A close-up of the nose and squinting eyes of Gib's niece - a blacl, white, and orange cat.There was much ado yesterday.

His Harryship rose before dawn, and all ran hither and yon to do his bidding.

He goes to join Mr Secretary [Sir Robert Cecil] on ambassage to the King of France.  They’ll beg him not to friend Spain.

All I can say is, Queen Puss should have sent that King the aid he sought.

What will Mr Secretary get for his pains?  Wet fur and no fish.  (As my mother would have sayt.)

His Harryship’s chamber was in disarray.  The kitchen cat and I made a good breakfast from his leavings.  Then I found paper, dipped his pen, and writ:

Touch not the basket of my Cat, nor the papers therein.  Burn this when you have read it.

H. Southampton.

I cannot write as well as a secretarie doth, but I would be a very poor skoller if I could not write as well as an Earl can.

Then I stepped out to where his horses waited, snorting and stamping.  They’ll not be so haughtie after being ridden through mire.

Our Earl was standing apart.  He was talking to a gardener.

“Most willingly, your lordship,” sayt the fellow, cap in hand, though he’d scarce enough hair to keep his brain warm.  “I’ll call my son.  He’ll count it an honour.”  And added in haste, lest he be thought insolent,Our childern loved that Gib.  Specially our poor Puss [Bess].

A strange thing happened.  A drop of water came from the gardener’s eye and left a glistering trail upon his cheek.  He begged forgiveness, saying, “She’s in Heaven now.”

Our Earl placed a hand upon his shoulder.  “I well recall your daughter,” sayt he in his softest voice.  And how he praised her!  The pretty curtsey she had made him, her fair speech, her sweet smile.

Yes, your Harryship, thought I.  Now I know why many love you.  But when your bum’s in the saddle and the world lies before you, will you spare a thought for my uncle or your gardener’s daughter?

Perchance I wrong him.

The horses moved off slow.  I walked a way behind them.

All saw a boy and girl come by with a small cart.  We heard the gardener call, “Do nowt blasphemious, mind.”

One of our Earl’s gentlemen sayt, “A funeral?  For a cat?”

He replied, “I told the gardener to bury him.  How he goes about it matters not to me.”  Then he added, “But the first lesson that cat taught me was worth the learning.  I took him up, and he shat on me.

A lesson in warefulness?  I doubt he’s learnt it.

I went to find Linkin and Nero.  They told me a cat from our stable had been by, inviting all to farewell my uncle at our Field on the morrow.

Nero had offered a song in his honour.

“What have you in mind?” I arrkst.  (I’ve not forgot how he contrived to insult me in the verse he made upon my late mother.)

“An excellent song,” sayt he.  “I heared it at our Earl’s house one summer eve as I sat ’neath a window.  Come again sweet love etcetera.”

“That’s a lewd song about a wicked woman,” sayt Linkin.

John Dowland’s First Book of Songs and Airs, printed in 1597.

“True,” sayt Nero.  “She hoist her tail for a gentleman, and then disdained him.  He was much aggrieved to learn there’d be no more scruffing.”

“She brake his heart,” sayt Linkin.  “And made mock of his misery.”

“One fool deserves another,” sayt Nero. “But I’ll amend the words.”

I feared the worst.

What a throng of cats came to our assembly!

Most could not believe my uncle was gone from this world.  He was with us for so long he seemed immortal.

“He was not of an age,” sayt one, “but for all time.”

Then Nero rose up.  He sang:

Come again, all cats do now invite
Friend Gib, who came so oft to bring us true delight.

To sit, to hear, to whurr, to sing, to sigh
with him again in sweetest sympathy.

Come again, that we may cease to mourn
because he did depart, and leave us all forlorn.

We wait, we weep, we wail, we waul, we cry
to ease our grief in feline harmony.

Poor verse.  But all gave Nero great applauds.

Some cats (readie to woo us queens, and fire-hot to show theirselves) joined with him to sing the song again.

Brats began to yowl in the cottages nearby.  One dog barked, then another.

“Once more!” cried Nero.  And all gave voice.

How we sang!  Even the youngest cats let out a waul or two, though they could scarce have known my uncle.  Nor heard his tales, save from mothers wishing to affright them with monsters and wicked witches.

A cottage door oped, and a woman came at us with a broom.  We fled away like shadows.

A fit end to my uncle’s funeral.


Toutparmoi - Note from the EditorI’m taking a break from blogging, so this will be the last post for a couple of months or so.

Gib’s niece (who would have written this in February 1598) might not have liked Nero’s verse, but at least Gib had a poetick send off.  Unlike William Shakespeare, whose death in 1616 seems to have gone unremarked by his fellow poets.

I hate to think what the “feline harmony” sounded like, but there are many modern renditions of John Dowland’s melancholy song that’s usually referred to as Come Again.  My favourites are by counter tenor/alto Daniel Taylor, and by tenor William Ferguson.

The Earl of Southampton had Queen Elizabeth’s permission to remain overseas for two years, and take with him 10 servants, 6 horses, and £200.  He also purchased a letter of credit for 1,000 crowns, payable to him in Rouen (Akrigg, p.69).

He must have been delighted to be on the move.  But he did take a fond farewell of Elizabeth Vernon shortly before he sailed.

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31 thoughts on “92:  We Honour My Uncle

            • toutparmoi April 6, 2017 / 3:43 am

              He’s great. I first heard the song when it was used in a TV series called Second Skin (I think) with Joanna Lumley. Once I’d tracked the singer down, I bought his “Tears of the Muse” CD.

              Like

              • toutparmoi April 6, 2017 / 3:52 am

                Whoops and Thank Google. The TV series was Sensitive Skin.

                Like

              • April Munday April 6, 2017 / 3:56 am

                It looks like a great CD. There are some great counter-tenors out there at the moment.

                Liked by 1 person

  1. cadburycat April 6, 2017 / 6:16 am

    God rest his soul. My beautiful boy passed away on Saturday, at 20. The Cadbury shaped hole in my life is vast.

    Liked by 2 people

    • toutparmoi April 6, 2017 / 11:50 am

      I’m sorry to hear your Cadbury has gone.
      You must be missing him dreadfully.

      Like

      • cadburycat April 6, 2017 / 5:14 pm

        I do. It’s horrible without him, because disabled as he was, he followed me everywhere in the house, and he sat on my knee. He spent his last hours on my lap and died in my arms

        Liked by 1 person

        • toutparmoi April 6, 2017 / 10:33 pm

          What a loving cat. It must feel like you’ve lost a piece of yourself.

          Like

  2. claudiothecat April 6, 2017 / 7:04 am

    Funerals bring out the best and the worst in people and felines alike. Fortunately in this case, the best. I shall miss Gib and his erudite yarns. Thank you for bringing him to us and I wish you a well deserved break.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. The Amused Onlooker April 6, 2017 / 2:21 pm

    I’m glad Nero was civil. I think Linkin and Nero will miss Gib. They’re the only ones of their generation left now. I hope you have an enjoyable and productive blogging break!

    Liked by 1 person

    • toutparmoi April 6, 2017 / 3:11 pm

      Thanks! I think Nero in particular will miss Gib, and competing with him as a poet.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. roshendalal April 7, 2017 / 4:10 pm

    sad that Gib is gone. Still miss my Sweetie.I know what feline harmony sounds like! I try to shut them up in case neighbours object.

    Liked by 1 person

    • toutparmoi April 7, 2017 / 5:03 pm

      Some of our animal companions create special places in our hearts. I loved your memoir of Sweetie and the other cats of your/her acquaintance. I’m hoping to find time soon to do a review.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. dornahainds April 8, 2017 / 2:47 am

    Brava.. 🌹🌹🌹
    And enjoy your well deserved sabbatical. 😎😇

    Like

  6. mitchteemley April 9, 2017 / 8:17 am

    We’ll miss you. Glad to know The Earl of Southampton’s Cat: The Next Generation will be back!

    Liked by 1 person

    • toutparmoi April 9, 2017 / 8:26 am

      Thanks, Mitch. Though I fear Gib’s niece may prove a very different cat from her uncle.

      Like

  7. Soul Gifts April 11, 2017 / 2:06 pm

    Gid is dead?! I must have missed a few posts while we were away. A caterwauling send off sounds perfect for him 🙂 Have an awesome break.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Robyn Haynes April 14, 2017 / 6:17 pm

    Thank you Denise, for many posts of entertaining edification. Gib will be sadly missed. Enjoy your break.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. colonialist May 24, 2017 / 9:10 am

    Alas, the late Gib. At least he had a good catophony at his wake.
    Will be watching out for your return!

    Liked by 1 person

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